One of the major componants of this journey is to lose weight. It's something I have struggled with for a long time because my motives were never right. It's always been about looking better, fitting into smaller clothes, losing it for everyone else. One of the tools that sets me up for disappointment is my scale. I love and hate my scale. Whenever I diet, I hop on often and if the numbers are decreasing, I'm happy. The minute they go up (even by 1 or 2 lbs), I'm discouraged. I told myself that this time, it's not about looking amazing (although, lets face it, who wouldn't want to look amazing) or fitting into smaller clothes ect.. but this time the number that matters more to me is my blood sugar numbers. The side effect is that I lose weight. I'm trying this approach because I never have before. I weighed myself a few weeks ago and my high tech scale recorded the weight. That number is locked in. It was not a nice number either.
Thursday morning (2/6), I was putting on my clothes and noticed my stomach seemed not so bloated and puffy. I jumped on the scale. What??? I lost 6.8 lbs! I am officially under a number that has been with me for 10 years. I'm not that far under but I'm under. That is huge for me.
How do I feel about it? Well, I am certainly happy and feel motivated, but there is this nagging feeling that I have felt since Thursday to jump on it again. I have to really work hard on not giving in. I want to try to weigh myself every week or every 2 weeks. I have to keep thinking of those blood sugar numbers. That has to be my focus. Every day is a new day to work on exercising more, eating healthier and keeping on track with my journey.
I have to be honest though, that feeling when I looked down at my scale and saw the loss was SUCH a great feeling. ;)
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